31 Days of Breastfeeding Journeys | Day 3 | World Breastfeeding Week 2016
"I have breastfed twice before my daughter, both times I failed after several months with a mysterious dwindling supply. I became really depressed feeling like I had failed my sons. Because of this i dreaded breastfeeding my daughter this time around. But I decided I will be fighting. But it hasn’t been easy and most days I am not sure how much longer before something else comes up and ends our journey.
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So far we have had severe ties that had to be corrected. Her’s were corrected at just 3 days old and while I knew it was necessary I felt horrendous and guilty. I cried the whole time while she practically didn’t cry at all. We have had latch issues. She has had neck issues, which we think made it uncomfortable to nurse at times.
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She has refused to nurse from just one side for days at a time. She has refused the bottle which means I cannot be away from her ever. Then she was diagnosed with a dairy protein intolerance, so I have had to go off dairy. This also means that all of the milk I had saved up for a dreaded rainy day is useless to us now. In a way I feel like everything has been thrown my way, but at the same time I am so happy to have made it this far. My main goal is to not feel like I failed at the end of this journey.
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But that in and of itself is hard, because mommy guilt is real! I could have taken the easy way out however if I had I wouldn’t have these beautiful memories. One of my favorite things is the way my daughters eyes roll back into her head the moment she latches. The thought alone that nothing is more satisfying and comforting to her makes my heart flutter.
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The best advice I have ever gotten is this: “When you feel like giving up, give yourself a month and see how you feel then!” No matter how low some moments have been, a few weeks later things would look better and I would be so thankful I hadn’t given up yet!" ~Cindy
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